Now this one is counter-intuitive. But here is why drinking makes you more intelligent.
The infamous Cliff Clavin of Cheer’s fame explains in detail to Norm why drinking is important in maintaining those brain cells that keep one smart.
“Well you see, Norm, it’s like this,” Cliff said. “A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and the weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general speed and health, of the whole group, keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.”
So how does that have anything to do with drinking one might ask. Well, Cliff has the most apropos answer. And you know what? On the surface, it sounds not only funny but plausible. Who are we fooling? It is stupid and funny as hell.
“In much the same way,” Cliff continues. “The human brain operates as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”
This is one for the ages!