Category: General
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Best Advice To A Surgery To Ensure A Positive Outcome (FUNNY)
An older gentleman was On the operating table AWAITING surgery And he insisted that his son, A renowned surgeon, PERFORM the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia, HE asked to speak to his son. “Yes, Dad , what is it?” “Don’t be nervous, son; DO your best, AND just remember, IF it…
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Interpretation Of Prescription By This Senior Citizen (FUNNY)
A distraught senior citizen PHONED her doctor’s office. “Is it true,” she wanted to know, “that the medication YOU prescribed has to be taken FOR the rest of my life?” “‘Yes, I’m afraid so,”‘ the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence BEFORE the senior lady replied, “I’m wondering, then, JUST how serious…
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The Experiences Of A Blonde, Brunette, And A Redhead (VERY FUNNY)
Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they watched the boss leave work early. One day, the girls decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went…
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Husband Taking the Brunt? Well Mostly It Is Their Fault (FUNNY)
A Husband Will Be A Husband? A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. ‘What was that for?’ the man asked. The wife replied ‘That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket’..…
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Confession Of An Old Man – Did He Do That? (Funny)
An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues: Old Man: ‘I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitch-hiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each of them three times.’ Priest:…
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The Irishman, The Priest, And An Affair – He Simply Listened
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ‘I almost had an affair with another woman.’ The priest said, ‘What do you mean, almost?’ The Irishman said, ‘Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.’ The priest said, ‘Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re…
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At the Nursing Home…
Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic, the other residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined…
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Ouch..that hurts! Another Cow Joke (Real Funny)
A man walks into the bedroom with a sheep on a leash and says… “Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache.” The wife, lying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says, “If you weren’t such an idiot, you’d know that’s a sheep, not a cow.”…
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It Took A Lot Of Effort To Bite My Wife (FUNNY)
An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk. The wife said: “You used to hold my hand when we were courting..” Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to…
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ANDY ROONEY SEX! (FUNNY)
These are great! Too bad he’s not around anymore… ANDY ROONEY SEX! 1. When I was born, I was given a choice – a big pecker or a good memory…. I don’t remember what I chose. 2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. 3. A wife is a sex object.…
